had a dream last night where marbles were back en vogue and everyone carried their marbles around in cute little pouches that they’d clip onto their backpacks or purse straps or belt loops so they’d always have their marbles on them and your marbles were deeply personal objects that showcased your individual personality and people would get really passionate and proud of them and playing for keeps was a deeply serious and honor-bound affair and i played a game with an old man while waiting for a bus and he told me how he met his wife while playing in a for-keeps tournament and in a miracle shot he knocked out her most precious marble a brilliant sparkling green one with an inside like a geode and when he looked up he found she was crying at its loss and so right there on the spot he proposed to her so that she could divorce him and take it back in the divorce “but in the end,” he told me, “she kept me and the marble” and i awoke teary and resentful to be ripped from a fleeting world that had found for itself such a small and beautiful peace
gonna start a letterboxd account and base all my reviews on how successful i think i’d be at telepathically dominating the lead actor if i ever ran across them irl
That’s actually not a terrible entry to thirst after. I mean, you could technically count it as necrophilia, but its consensual necrophilia, so you do you.
What the fuck
Of all the reblogs and additions to this post, this is the one you’re shocked by?
Consensual necrophilia is not a phrase I thought I’d hear. Then again this is tumblr, so maybe that’s on me
Hot take: the term consensual necrophilia also applies to vampires, since they’re undead creatures. Wanna fuck Strahd? You’re in the same boat with the lich fuckers.
However, what I think the real treasure we’re all sleeping on is liches….in love. Just immortal wizard gals being pals.
I am absolutely here for the immortal undead lesbians
IS IT STILL NECROPHILIA IF YOU’RE DEAD TOO??
I don’t think so?
Ok next topic is a dragon and a human beastiality for the dragon?
both are sentient, so its just interspecies sex.
…I am now reminded of that argument I got into about whether or not a half-dragon would have a cloaca.
This post is an entire dungeon of bad decisions at this point
I think you mean legendary decisions
Legendary for being bad
This is not what i expected when i started this blog
To be fair, i wasnt expecting a whole lot when i started this blog in 2014
But it definitely didnt include 10k notes of thirsty monsterfuckers
11 approaching 12 thousand
Fuck you’re right
ok but can we just talk about abberations cuz like they’re intelligent and adults but their minds are inscrutable to humans. so like does that mean you can consent to sex with them? cuz you’re on wayyyy different levels of intelligence? but also they’re an adult with the capacity to give and understand consent? but could a normal sentient’s mind comprehend consenting to sex with them? help me out here i’m confused.
If both parties are sentient, its just interspecies sex, stop trying to overcomplicate things. Just because one species is better at calculus does not complicate the less intelligent species’ capacity for consent.
Can I just snuggle a clan of kobolds? No porking, just snuggles.
My friend, I would literally rather die than tell someone they can’t get some consensual snuggling
Actually, are you fucking the plants, or are you harvesting them to use as aphrodisiacs? Because most plants and plant-like entities in the bestiary are gonna fuck you up regardless of which you choose.
How have all you fucks passed on the hot devil women???
Because theres no debate on them; if you’re sexually attracted to women or other feminine entities, you’re going to fuck the succubus.
Imagine walking into a dungeon and tripping on the first step then breaking every individual bone in your body on the way down the obscenely large staircase that’s probably a hamfisted metaphor to do with descents and all that crap
Hey. Why isn’t the moon landing a national holiday in the US. Isn’t that fucked up? Does anyone else think that’s absurd?
It was a huge milestone of scientific and technological advancement. (Plus, at the time, politically significant). Humanity went to space! We set foot on a celestial body that was not earth for the first time in human history! That’s a big deal! I’ve never thought about it before but now that I have, it’s ridiculous to me that that’s not part of our everyday lives and the public consciousness anymore. Why don’t we have a public holiday and a family barbecue about it. Why have I never seen the original broadcast of the moon landing? It should be all over the news every year!
It’s July 20th. That’s the day of the moon landing. Next year is going to be the 54th anniversary. I’m ordering astronaut shaped cookie cutters on Etsy and I’m going to have a goddamn potluck. You’re all invited.
Hey. Hey. Tumblr. Ides of March ppl. We can do this
One of the only thing the 2000s had going for it was the mythbusters. Those dudes ruled, nobody hated the mythbusters, I mean they hated each other but nobody else hated the mythbusters
An entire generation of scientists, engineers, and psychos with access to amphetamines owe so much to them
Sorry prev, but your tags were good and I felt like everyone should get to read them
I attack first. I draw my blade and take a swing. You look rather confused. This confusion is justified as we are 40 ft apart in the middle of a showdown.
